For the last three years I've been struggling with my mental health. For the last year, I've also had some physical health challenges.
I've noticed friends (and I'm very grateful for all of them) are more comfortable around physical than mental health. I understand this. I was the same - until I was diagnosed with a mental health condition myself.
I have had good support - both prayer and practical - and, as I said, I'm grateful.
But why do we often try to fix each other? Especially with my mental health, I longed for someone to just be there. Not to try and fix me or come up with a solution or tell me how things should be. I wanted someone to sit with me and share my pain and grief, to be with me in it.
There was definitely a place for encouraging me that I will come out of this one day. But I didn't always need to hear that. What I needed more than anything was for someone to acknowledge the trauma and my distress, not to do or say anything, but just to be with me.
And I have to say I have a handful of wonderful friends who do listen and are there for me, and I'm so grateful for them.
I think when someone is grieving or coping with past or current trauma, or similar situation, we just need to be there for them. Let's stop trying to fix what seems to be wrong and instead simply listen, hug, cook a meal or bake shortbread. Sometimes we just have spiky emotions that need to be safely expressed with someone we can trust.
