23 February 2021

Name


The first consultant I worked for as a medical secretary/PA taught me how important is a name. His surname was unusual but similar to another name - so many people got it wrong. He would even refuse to meet with medical reps who couldn't be bothered to get it right (I would warn them though it didn't always work). 

Three years ago I was diagnosed with a mental health condition called Dissociative Identity Disorder. Because of a traumatic and abusive past, I have over fifty little girls in my head. They are all 'me' at different ages. As they each appeared, I gave them nicknames to tell them apart but my therapist suggested giving them real names. I think that may have been a bit of a turning point in my healing process - giving them names. By naming them, they knew they were precious and of value. They were heard and seen, known and loved (which I guess is what we all want).

Initially, my diagnosis really got me down. It wasn't just the fragmentation that was difficult to deal with - it was the realisation that I'd been so badly hurt in the past. I was greatly helped and comforted at the time by a verse in Isaiah  (40:26) which seemed to fit my situation perfectly:

Lift up your eyes and look to the heavens:
Who created all these?  
He who brings out the starry host one by one 
and calls forth each of them by name.
Because of his great power and mighty strength,
not one of them is missing.

Broken and hurting we might be, but He knows me and all my girls by name - and not one of us is missing. My Daddy-God loves and cares for us in a way my abusers did not.



No comments:

Post a Comment